Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
