I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
where are my eyebrows?
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