Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
