Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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