New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
