you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
