Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
the day after is always just damage control
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
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