I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
