He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize