I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
