Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
