In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
