i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
