We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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