I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
