Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
