Are we in a gay sports bar?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize
