do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
