Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
