So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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