I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize