So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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