he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
