so explain again why im purple
no
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
