i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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