Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
