guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
