DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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