I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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