EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize