the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
