Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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