and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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