your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Randomize
