i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
