Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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