You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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