at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
