I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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