I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
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