Kareoke will never be a sober sport
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize