i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
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Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
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I still have a little drunk in my system
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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