dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Randomize
