what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
