What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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