Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
