he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
