I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Can't talk, ducks in the car
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
