I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
