I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Randomize
