I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
i out mim tonsoeep
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
