her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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